*TURN OFF YOUR LIGHTS*

(And give yourself a severe case of eyestrain)

(The future isn't what it used to be....)

"CARD CAPTOR SCIENCE THEATER 3000" (SEASON ONE)

EPISODE 9: MADISON’S MYSTERY CRUSH

(A Card Captor Sakura [CardCaptors] MSTing)

MSTed From the Desk of Card Captor Schlueter (aka Syaoran-kun)

This is a MSTing of a work of fiction created by another author.

Use of copyrighted and trademarked material is for entertainment

purposes only; no infringement on the original copyrights or

trademarks held by Best Brains, Inc. is intended or should be inferred.

“Card Captor Sakura” and “CardCaptors” are trademarks of CLAMP and those who distribute them.

“Madison’s Mystery Crush” is the property of Chocolat* and she’s welcome to it. I do not intend to offend her by making fun of her work like this but I figure it's only a matter of time before someone does. Think of this as another form of C&C. ;)

(Cue "Card Captor Science Theater 3000 Love Theme" in 5....4....3....)

It's the not-too-distant future,

Last Sunday BC

There was this girl named Sakura

Quite different from you or me

She captured Clow Cards with her friends

All seen through Tomoyo’s camera lens

They tried to save the human race,

But Eriol lost his patience

So he shot them into space!!!!

Sakura: (Hoeeee……)

Syaoran and Tomoyo: (Now what?)

We'll send them crappy fanfics

The worst we can find  (lalala)

They'll have to sit and read them all and we'll monitor their minds  (lalala)

Now keep in mind they can't control

When the fanfics begin or end  (lalala)

Because, let’s face it, after all

Eriol’s not really their friend;

CARD CAPTOR ROLL CALL:

Meiling:

'Why me?’

Tomoyo:

'Smile!'

Syaoran:

'I hate my life.'

KEROOOOOOO!!!

'It’s not my fault!'

If you're wondering how they eat and breathe

And other science facts  (lalala)

Then repeat to yourself

*It's just a MiST*

You should really just relax

For Card Captor Science Theater 3000!!!

DEEP 13

14:50 Hours

The evil Dr. Eriol Hiiragazawa, mad scientist, evil sorcerer and Harry Potter look-alike, strode confidently through the halls of Deep 13 once again, having regained whatever sanity he had before. Of course, dealing with that loony redhead hadn’t helped him much.

But he was back in charge! That was what was important. When the automatic doors opened to the main lab he was greeted by a giant banner that read “Welcome Back, Dr. H!” This, of course, was the work of his two lab assistants, TV’s Ruby Moon and Spinel Sun.

“Welcome back, Doctor!” said Ruby Moon in an unusually cheerful tone.

“It’s nice to see that you two are in a good mood.” Dr. Eriol replied.

“Are you kidding?” said a frazzled Spinel Sun. “While you’ve been gone, Pinky over there’s been playing on my glucose intolerance at every opportunity.”

Eriol ignored the obvious fanfic plug and moved on. “Did you make that new Clow card as I requested?”

“Yes, sir.” Ruby Moon replied. “And we have a little welcome home gift for you too.” She handed Dr. Eriol a file folder.

The not-so-good doctor glanced over the fanfic inside and an evil grin came to his face. “Ha, ha! This is perfect! Excellent work!” Eriol gave one of those evil chuckles mad scientists always use. “Well, let’s get Keiichi, Belldandy, Urd and Skuld on the line then, shall we?”

THE SATELLITE OF LOVE

Syaoran Li was sleeping peacefully. He had just spent twenty-eight hours working on repairs to the satellite with Yue. With the work finally finished he headed back to his room and collapsed on the bed. While he was recovering, Tomoyo had gotten yet another brilliant idea for a prank. She got hold of ‘The Doll’ card and, with a little help from Sakura, had started piling Sakura plushies on and around Syaoran’s bed. The only reason Sakura had gone along with this was because she thought it was cute.

Unfortunately, their fun was cut short when Meiling came through the door. “Hey, guys…” she began “HEY! What do you think you’re doing?!”

Sakura and Tomoyo sweatdropped. “It’s just a little prank, Meiling.” Sakura explained.

Meiling picked up one of the plushies. “Looks more like blatant self-promotion to me.” Meiling tossed the plushie, which bounced off Syaoran’s head.

“What’s… going on…?” Syaoran mumbled as he rubbed his eyes.

“Dr. Tomoe and his Witches 5 are on the line.” Meiling explained.

Syaoran mumbled. “Tell him he can take his call and shove it up his…” It was then that Syaoran opened his eyes and saw the cute smiling face of a super-deformed Sakura plushie inches from his face. “What the…?!” He sat bolt upright spilling Sakura plushies everywhere. “What’s going on here?!” he shouted as his face turned red.

Meiling sighed. “Just move. Dr. H hates waiting and he always blames me when you’re late.

“Nothing like fifteen minutes of sleep before going back to work.” Syaoran grumbled.

DEEP 13

“Well, well. If it isn’t Hitomi and Van.” Eriol quipped. “How nice of you to grace us with your presence.”

“Cram it, ferret face…” Syaoran grumbled.

“Well, it’s nice to see that you’re your usual sunny self, Syaoran.” Eriol beamed. “It’s been awhile so I’ll go first with the Clow Card exchange this week.”

Ruby Moon brought out Eriol’s latest Clow card creation. “This week, I present to you ‘The Microsoft™’. As you know, Microsoft got into big trouble with the American government when his empire violated anti-trust laws.” Eriol explained. “Instead of doing the logical thing and buying the entire planet Bill tried to beat them in court. But I have captured his moneymaking genius in the card. This card will create brilliant software that will make billions. Then we’ll make some minor but crucial improvements and sell it as a new version.” He set the card back on it’s tray. “I’m working on a similar invention for the video game market. I’m going to call it ‘The Capcom™’ in honor of the company that gave us a billion versions of Street Fighter 2.”

THE SATELLITE OF LOVE

“I’ve always been more of a Samurai Shodown fan myself,” said Kero.

“Funny you should mention upgrades.” Tomoyo said smiling. “Because our card this week is an enhancement for ‘The Doll’ card.”

“Exactly,” said Sakura. “Plushies are cute. But living plushies are even cuter. With this new card you can bring your favorite plushies to life.”

Meiling brought out a box of plushies. “Once activated,” Sakura continued. “The plushies will act on any personality traits you give them.” Sakura fished two plushies out of the box, one of her and one of Syaoran and set them up a couple of feet apart. “Watch carefeully.” Sakura said a little incantation. The Sakura plushie got up and walked over to the Syaoran plushie.

“Waii!! Li-kun!” it said in it’s squeaky and kawaii little voice. The Sakura plushie then gave the Syaoran plushie a big hug causing the aforementioned Syaoran plushie to blush.

“That is sooooo CUTE!!!” exclaimed Tomoyo, who was taping the whole thing.

“We have some other plushies here too.” Sakura moved on to a set of Nakuru and Touya plushies. She once again whispered the incantation. The Nakuru plushie immediately glomped the Touya plushie. “Touya!!!” it shouted cheerfully, causing TV’s Ruby Moon to scowl slightly and Spinel Sun to chuckle.

While this was going on, one of the Tomoyo plushies came to life. It picked up a mini-camcorder and started taping the demonstration.

“Next, we have Lunch-Time Yuki!” Sakura announced as she set a Yukito plushie on the table. She set down a bowl of rice and some chopsticks in front of it. Immediately the plushie began eating at a furious pace. Sakura reached into the box and pulled out another plushie, this one looked like ‘The Rain’ card. “And last, but not least, the Tickle-Me Rain Card doll.”

Sakura gave the plushie a squeeze. “Hee, hee, hee!!” The Rain giggled in its kawaii little voice. “In honor of Spielberg’s movie ‘A.I.’ we’re calling this ‘The Blue Fairy’ card. What do you think, sirs?”

DEEP 13

“Gaaaaakkk!!!” choked Spinel Sun. “Toooo…. Swe.. eeet” The winged cat passed out.

“It appears you went a tad overboard on the sappiness meter.” Eriol said looking at his fallen assistant. “But, it’s that time again. To turn the lights down low, get some popcorn and scream in agony. This week we have a very delightful little ‘CardCaptors’ fic for you. It’s called ‘Madison’s Mystery Crush’ by Chocolat* and it is a prime example of stupidity. Love it or shove it, my friends.” Eriol gave an evil cackle. “Send ‘em the fanfic, Ruby Moon.”

“I have to do everything around here.” Ruby Moon grumbled.

“help… meeeee…” Spinel Sun whimpered.

THE SATELLITE OF LOVE

Syaoran let out a long sigh. “So much for sleep, I guess.”

“Poor Li-kun…” said a sympathetic Sakura.

Suddenly alarms and sirens rang out.

“OHHHH, WE'VE GOT FANFIC SIGN!!!” Sakura cried out.

(Door 6: It slides open on both sides..)

(Door 5: It's made of beads. They explode out towards you, and you

move on..)

(Door 4: It falls toward you, missing your foot by inches.)

(Door 3: It's a castle gate, that rises into the ceiling..)

(Door 2: It’s made of mirrors. You risk the seven years bad luck and shatter them with a hammer.)

(Door 1: It splits in four ways, twice.)

(Door .7: A beam of golden light erupts from the floor. You walk into it.)

Sakura, Syaoran, Tomoyo and Kero-Chan emerged from the light. The three take their seats in the theater while Kero-Chan floats overhead.

Kero: You don’t suppose it’s possible that Dr. H just assumes all dub based fics are bad, do you?

Syaoran: You mean that he might send us a good fic by mistake?

Sakura: We can only hope.

>It was recess. Everyone was playing outside.

Syaoran: It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.

Tomoyo: Why do we only seem to get the worst?

>Sakura was playing hand games with her friends,

Sakura: Don’t even think about it, Kero.

Kero: Why do you always think the worst of me?

>Li was not there,

Kero: He’s never been all there.

Syaoran: HEY!

>Mei Lin was going to the bathroom,

All: Eeeewww!!!

Sakura: And outside too.

Tomoyo: I could’ve done without that.

>and Madison was sitting in a corner of in the yard. She was thinking of something, that she knew would be a problem, >a really big problem. She liked someone in her class, but she didn’t know how to tell the person. She was trying to >think of a way to tell him.

Sakura: Does that make this an E+T fic?

Kero: In the dub, there is no Eriol.

Syaoran: One of the few good things about it.

Tomoyo: Ouch!

>She wanted to find someone to help her go right out and tell him. But who?

Sakura: Yes, who?

Tomoyo: Inquiring minds want to know!

> “Hi Mei Lin!” she said when she saw Mei Lin come back outside.

Syaoran: Smooth.

Kero: I don’t know if Meilin is the first person I’d ask for romantic advice.

Tomoyo:<Meilin> The key is to cling to a guy like a barnacle and follow him everywhere he goes!

> “Uh, hi Madison.” Mei Lin said.

Sakura:<Meilin> Keep her the hell away from me!!!

> “Uh, well, I was hoping you could help me.”

> “With what?”

> “I like someone. I’m not telling you who, but I was hoping you could help me find a way to tell him.”

Sakura: Does this remind anyone else here of “You’ve Got Mail”?

Syaoran: No. But now that you mention it…

> “Well, you could always just walk up to him and say ‘I like you’.”

Tomoyo:<Madison> Nah. Too easy. Do you have anything more awkward and embarrassing?

> “But maybe you could help me think of a more creative way to tell him.”

Tomoyo:<Madison> How about I have a message written on a blimp?

Sakura:<Meilin> It’s been done.

> “Well…um…okay, but don’t get mad if I can’t think of a way.”

Tomoyo:<Madison>WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T THINK OF A WAY??!!! YOU MUST, DAMMIT!!!

> “Okay, the bell just rang, we should go back to class.”

Kero: Really? I didn’t hear it.

Sakura: Maybe it’s silent. Like alarms in banks.

> Mei Lin and Madison both went back inside, then followed by Sakura and her friends.

Syaoran: Well, so far it’s not too bad. It’s just incredibly dull.

> It was art class.

Sakura: There’s an art to this kind of class.

Syaoran: And you have to love art or you have no class.

>The art teacher told everyone to paint something they really liked.

Kero:<Art Teacher>Painting the walls would be nice! Because of cutbacks they haven’t had a fresh coat in twenty years.

>Madison couldn’t think of anything to paint.

Tomoyo:<Madison> Hmmmm…

Kero: Picasso, she’s not.

>Then, she thought, and she started painting.

Syaoran: So, up until now she hasn’t been thinking?

Sakura: Makes her sound like a character from “Clueless”.

Tomoyo:<Madison> Like, wow! I look, like, so totally cool with this paintbrush!

>It was the person she liked.

Sakura: You don’t usually do portraits of people you hate.

>He had brown hair, dark eyes,

Tomoyo: Sounds kind of like Li-kun.

>and didn’t sound very much like a boy.

Kero: It is him!

Syaoran: Cram it, plushie!

>It was hard to draw exactly what he looked like. A kid who just got into the class who was sitting next to her looked >at the painting. Since she didn’t know anyone very well yet, she didn’t go “Hey everyone! Come look at what Madison >drew!” or, “Hah ha ha ha ha! Madison drew a boy!” but said, “Hey, that’s a really good painting, uh, what’s your name >again?”

Tomoyo:<Madison> I never gave it to you.

Kero:<singing>Madison and the new kid, sittin’ in a tree…

Sakura: Real mature, Kero.

> “Madison.” She said.

Syaoran: Murder, she wrote.

Sakura: Cute, Li-kun.

> “Oh.”

Tomoyo:<Madison> Whatever.

> “Thanks for the compliment.”

Sakura: This isn’t going to go down in history as one of the most intellectual conversations, is it?

> “Your welcome.”

Syaoran: Forget it. There are only so many times you can do that joke.

Sakura: Could someone send Chocolat* to remedial English, please?

Kero: And while we’re at it why don’t we send Lady Yuy, Mike Rhea and hikaru shidou too.

> Madison kept on painting.

Kero: The fic went on.

Tomoyo: We grew bored.

>She was really happy with her work. Maybe she could show it to him to show how much she liked him.

Syaoran: If he didn’t recognize himself when he looked at it, it can’t be that good.

Sakura: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Li-kun.

>Madison and Mei Lin met up with each other while they were walking to school. Mei Lin took a different street that day >so she would end up where Madison was walking.

Kero: So… She knows Madison’s route by heart?

Syaoran: The plot thickens.

Tomoyo: Hell, it congeals.

>“So, Wasn’t I supposed to help you with your problem?”

Tomoyo:<Madison> You were supposed to but you COULDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING!!!

> “Hi Mei Lin! I didn’t think you would come this way.”

Sakura:<Meilin> BWA-HA-HA!! I knew it!!

Kero: Um… Whatever.

> “Well I am. And, I’ve got a perfect way to get you with this mystery boy you like! Do you have a hamster?”

Syaoran: A hamster?

Sakura: I don’t get it.

Kero: You’re not the only one.

> “No. I used to, but I bit his head off.”

All: Eeeewww!!!

Sakura: That was completely unnecessary.

Syaoran: American McGee’s Madison.

Kero:<Cheshire Cat from “American McGee’s Alice”> When is a hamster like a horseman?

> “Oh…now it won’t work.”

Kero: It’s kind of hard to work without a head.

Syaoran: Try telling that to George W. Bush.

Sakura: Ouch!

> “Why do you need a hamster?”

Tomoyo:<Meilin>I need it to run in the little wheel that makes my brain work.

Syaoran: If Meiling finds out you said that, she’ll have your head, Daidouji.

> “I thought you could give him a hamster. But that won’t work.”

Sakura: Uh, you can always buy another hamster.

> “He doesn’t have any pets. His parents are allergic to fuzzy animals.”

Sakura: Oh, okay.

> Then why does he still have Kiro? Madison thought. Kiro is fuzzy, so why is he allowed to keep him? Oh yeah, he >keeps him away from sight to everyone but Lee, Mei Lin, and Me.

Syaoran: Lee?! LEE?!! ARGHHHHH!!!!!!!

Sakura: Madison’s crush has Kero?

Kero: That can’t be right.

Tomoyo: Sounds like I have a crush on Sakura.

Sakura: She thinks I’m a boy? That can’t be right.

Kero: Yeah. Only a moron would make that mistake.

Syaoran: LEE!! I can’t believe it!!!

> Mei Lin and Madison keep walking. Soon they get to school.

Kero: And the yawns just keep on coming!

>“Bye!” “Good bye!” “See ya soon!”

Syaoran: Au revoir!

Sakura: Syaonara!

Tomoyo: Ta-ta!

Kero: Bite me!

Sakura: Kero…

>“Hey get over here! Remember our play-date?”

Sakura: Don’t even think about it, Kero.

Kero: You’re no fun.

>People were saying good-bye to each other.

Syaoran: NO? REALLY?! YOU THINK?!!

Sakura: Easy, Li-kun.

>Madison was fiddling with a paper clip when Mei Lin ran up to her with a piece of paper in her hand. “Hi Madison!” she >says, slapping her hand on Madison’s back. “Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Hi Mei Lin. What is it?”

Tomoyo:<Madison> Pardon my screaming.

> “Look at this!” Mei Lin said, shoving the paper into her face.

Tomoyo:<Madison> You don’t need to hold it that close! I’m not blind, y’know!

Kero: Meilin needs to cut down on the caffeine.

> “ Hum…School play…Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs…Sign up now…Play starts on April 23, 2001…are you sure >this will work?”

Sakura:<Meilin> No, I’m messing with your head.

> “Of course I’m sure! All you have to do is make sure he enters the play to, and make sure he gets the part of >the prince. If you can get that to happen, you to kiss, and pretend you really liked that-not like you didn’t-but follow >him around everywhere saying ‘Wasn’t that play fun?’ ‘You know, I just noticed, you’re really cute!’ and ‘Wanna come >to my house tonight?’ Stuff like that. I’ll help!”

Tomoyo:<Madison>Oh, is that all? Why don’t I juggle too?

> “Okay…but this better work.”

Tomoyo:<Madison>Or it’s your head that’ll be next.

> “Come on! Lets sign up!”

Kero:<singing>Be all that you can beeeee!

Sakura: She means the play, not the army, Kero.

> Madison and Mei Lin Went to the auditorium and Madison signed up for the play. “You’re signing up to?” >Madison asked, as Mei Lin wrote her name on the piece of paper. “Yeah. Of course. How would I be helping you if I >don’t? I have to watch what’s going on. Understand?”

All: No.

> “Yeah.”

Tomoyo:<Madison>Like, duh! What kind of total space case do you take me for?

> “Hey! You kids! Schools over! You’re supposed to go home!”

Sakura: Um… What?

Syaoran: Whatever you say, Casper.

> The vice principal walked in with a red face.

Kero: Hannibal Lecter strikes again!

Sakura: Eeewwww…

Syaoran: He’s a COMMIE!!!

Kero: So are you, China boy.

Syaoran: It wasn’t my choice, plushie.

> “Hey-what’s up with your fffcfeehhhh-” Mei Lin tried to say,

Sakura: And failed miserably.

>while Madison tried to keep her from getting in trouble, had her hand over her mouth.

Tomoyo: Meilin’s always opening her big mouth.

> “H-Hi M-M-Miss, Hehe, v-vice p-principal lady sir. Uh, w-we were just s-s-signing u-up f-f-for the play, uh sir. Ah, >hehehe…”

Syaoran: The role of Madison Taylor will now be played by Jerry Lewis.

Sakura: Well, at least this fic will be a big hit in France.

Kero:<Madison a la Jerry Lewis>I’m so sorry, Miss Principal type person, sir!

> “Oh, well then I guess you can go, but next time, I’m telling your parents.”

Sakura: Didn’t she just want them to leave a minute ago?

> “Okay, uh, bye.”

Tomoyo:<Madison> Whatever.

> Both girls ran off, laughing like crazy. Tell their parents! Why would she go and do that? Its useless, telling on >them just cause they stayed at school for a minute long.

Syaoran: That’s just what I was thinking.

> “Night Mom!” Madison says, walking upstairs into her bedroom and going to sleep. Unfortunately, she forgot to >brush her teeth, get into her pajamas, have dessert, and say goodnight to her dad. So, she had a miserable night.

Sakura: Um… What?

Syaoran: Nevermind.

Kero: You mean Madison was sleeping in the nude?!

Sakura: Kero…

>“Good morning,” Madison said to no one,

Kero: So, why’d she say it?

Sakura: Search me.

>yawning and glaring out the window, which let her view what weird stuff was out the window, like a man dressed in a >monkey suit running down the street screaming ‘I am a moron!’ very proudly.

Syaoran: Sounds like the author decided to make a cameo appearance.

Kero: Great. A self-insert fic.

>She didn’t bother to change her clothes, cause she was already wearing them,

Sakura: Um… She slept in her clothes?

>and went to take a bath like she did every day.

Tomoyo: Great. Next she’ll be bathing with her clothes on.

>Much to her surprise, she left the bathroom with a very wet body topped with very wet clothing, cause she didn’t >notice what she was doing all morning, cause she woke up to early, and made her to tired to think about a change of >clothing.

All: Huh?

Sakura: I guess she did bathe with her clothes on.

Kero:<Madison>Like, this reefer’s totally messed with what’s left of my totally cool brain!

Sakura: Kero!

Syaoran: I’d like to know what the author was smoking.

> Soon, Mei Lin and Madison met up with each other at school. “Hey, Madison,” Mei Lin asked, “how come you >don’t hang out with Sakura anymore?”

Tomoyo:<Madison> She is, like, such a dweeb. She totally clashes with my mall bunny persona!

> “Well, I donno.”

Syaoran: What you “donno” could fill a warehouse.

> “Oh, cause, you guys are really good friends and all, so I wanted to know why.”

Sakura:<Meilin>Why? Whyyyyyy? Oh, why?!

Tomoyo:<singing> Y… M… C…A!

Syaoran: Don’t start.

> Guys? Sakura’s the only guy of the two of us, so why is she calling me a guy? Madison thought.

Kero: Wait a second… Madison thinks Sakura is a guy?!

Tomoyo: WHAT?!

> “Oh, Madison, I think auditions for the play are today, we better go!”

Sakura: This just gets better and better, doesn’t it?

> Mei Lin grabbed Madison’s hand and ran of with Madison trailing behind her. When they got to the auditorium, >they, and other people, practiced for the part they wanted. Madison’s secret love was there to. He was rehearsing a >part for Snow White! But he’s a boy! Why would he want that part?

Kero: It’s… TSUBASA!!!

Syaoran:<Tsubasa>Ukyo-sama!!

Tomoyo: Or maybe, it’s Konatsu.

Kero:<Konatsu>Back off, Kurenai! That role is mine!

Sakura: You guys…

> Sakura was saying a line for the part she really wanted.

Tomoyo: Oh, God! Madison does think she’s a guy!!

Sakura: God help us all.

Syaoran:<Father Mulcahy>That’s my business.

>Snow White. Then she glanced over at Mei Lin and Madison, practicing right next to each other. She had noticed they >are always together, since a few days. She walked over to them. “Hey, since when are you two friends? And how >come you aren’t paying any attention to me Madison? Whats going on?” Sakura asked,

Sakura:<Sakura Avalon>I want ANSWERS, dammit!! Where were you on the night of the twenty-fifth?!

Tomoyo:<Madison a la Jack Nicholson> You want answers?

Sakura:<Sakura Avalon>I want the truth!

Tomoyo:<Madison a la Jack Nicholson>The truth? The truth?! You can’t handle the truth!!

>as her white hat fell off, and a guy in a black suit ran by, picked it up, and ran away.

Sakura: Um…

Tomoyo: Guess this is a black and white situation, ne?

> There was a big silence, then Madison spoke up. “Me and Mei Lin became friends over the last few days, and I >thought I spended all my time with you, and thought I should spend a little more time with my other friends for once. >Don’t worry, I’m still your friend.” Madison said

Sakura: Run that by me again.

Kero: That made no sense at all

Syaoran: Spended… Yeesh!

>as Mei Lin hit herself on the head with a school computer just for the fun of feeling harmed and having glass in her >ears.

All: Huh?

Kero: Everyone in this fic is out of it.

Sakura: This might explain why Meilin is such a whacko.

> “Oh…okay…well I’ll be seeing you.”

Tomoyo:<singing> I’ll be seeing you… In all the old familiar places!

> “Bye-bye increasingly large idiot!” Mei Lin shouted as Sakura left to practice for the part she wanted.

Sakura: Very clever, Meilin.

Tomoyo: Yeah. That must’ve taken whole second to come up with.

>“Oh, and if either of you see my hat, will you give it to me?” Sakura asked. “Sure!” They both said.

Tomoyo: Didn’t she notice that some guy in a black suit stole it awhile ago?

Kero: Must’ve been one of the cast of “Reservoir Dogs”.

Syaoran: Steve Buscemi strikes again!

> “Ring! Ring!” Someone was running down the halls ringing like a bell like he always did cause school was over >and afterward got detention for disturbing the classes.

Sakura: Is the author trying to be funny or something?

Kero: Well, I’m not laughing.

>Mei Lin decided to walk home with Li that day, cause everyone had to come to school, even if they have a deadly >disease that noone knew about yet.

Sakura: How does that explain why she walked home with Li?

Kero: Maybe Li is dying.

Syaoran:<Li Showron>Rose…bud…

>That was the rule. So Madison walked home with Sakura. “Hey, Madison?” Sakura said. “Wanna come to my house to >do homework?”

Kero:<Madison>Just homework? I’ll do more that that!

Tomoyo and Sakura: KERO!

> “Sure. I’d love to!” Madison replies.

Syaoran: God help us all.

> Madison and Sakura walked to Sakuras house. They both sat down at the kitchen table and started their >homework. A few hours later, they were almost done with there homework. This just proves that they’re both stupid.

Syaoran: You’re one to talk Chocolat*.

Sakura: I’ll say. Chocolat* needs help.

Kero: It’s nothing a rocket launcher won’t fix.

> “Hey Sakura? I have something to tell you.”

Tomoyo:<Madison> I have but four minutes to live!

> “What?”

All: EVER!!!

> “Well, I kinda, like you. A lot. To much to be friends with you, ya know, love you?”

Sakura: Very eloquent.

> “Madison.”

> “What?”

Sakura:<Sakura Avalon>You’re an idiot!

> “Are you the most insane person ever? I’m a girl!”

> “You are?”

> “Yes! You mean you didn’t know that?”

> “I thought you were a boy.”

Kero: I don’t believe this.

> “I’m a girl.”

Sakura: Great. Now she’s repeating herself too.

> “Oh, sorry.”

Syaoran: Yeah, you should be.

> “Crazy…”

Tomoyo: That’s putting it mildly.

> “Well, I guess I fell in love with the wrong gender. You look so much like a boy, ya know, with that short hair >an’ all.”

Syaoran: Give me a break.

> “Whatever.”

Tomoyo:<Madison>Hey! That’s my line!

> Madison left. She decided she wanted to finish her homework at home.

Kero: Good plan.

>“Hi Madison!” Mei Lin came running up the street to where Madison was.

Sakura: Dumb and Dumber are reunited.

> “Hi Mei Lin.”

Kero: As opposed to a low Meilin.

> “Did ya tell your secret boy ya liked him?”

Tomoyo:<Madison>Yeah, but he didn’t care for the decapitated hamster.

> “Yeh, but he turned to be Sakura. I thought she was a boy. She looks so much like one.”

Syaoran: She doesn’t get out much, does she?

> “What? You mean, I helped you try to find a good way to impress this ‘boy’ of yours, and he turns out to be a >she? It seems there will be a pounding in your future.”

Sakura: Uh-oh! Run for it!!

>So, Mei Lin beat up Madison in the middle of the hallway before class as they walk into the school when the bell rang >and got herself suspended for two week and she had a celebration cause she got to stay home.

Syaoran: Jeez… Meilin should see a therapist.

>Also Madison learned the difference between boys and girls.

Tomoyo:<Madison>Wow! That Angelina Jolie guy is soooo cute!

Kero: Or maybe not.

>Mei Lin started following Li around everywhere again,

Sakura: Big news flash.

Syaoran: It’s hard having groupies.

>and Sakura now and forever thought Madison was crazy.

Tomoyo: Gee, I wonder why?

>The End

Kero: Finally!

Sakura: Okay, comments?

Tomoyo: Where to begin?

Syaoran: How about with everyone being hideously OOC, even for “CardCaptors”?

Kero: How about everyone having the IQ of a breath mint?

Tomoyo: How about just everything?

Kero: Amen!

Sakura: Let’s get out of here, guys.

As soon as he got out of the theater, Syaoran headed back to his quarters to get some sleep. As he lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling, he heard a strange sound. He looked over to see a Sakura plushie scaling up the side of his bed. Once it finally got to the top of the mattress it let out a long exhausted sigh and dusted itself off.

Syaoran watched the little doll intently.

The plushie looked over in his direction. “Hayaan!!! Li-kun!!” The plushie rushed over as fast as its little feet would carry it and threw its little arms around Syaoran’s right arm. Syaoran was a little unsure what to do about the plushie that was nuzzling him in an affectionate manner.

Although he was certain Tomoyo had to be around somewhere with her camera.

Meanwhile, on the bridge, the Tomoyo plushie was still wandering around taping things. Just by accident, it stepped on the button.

THE REAL END

(Feel free to hum “Catch You, Catch Me” as the end credits roll)

What is it with me and plushies anyway? I hope you all enjoyed this latest MSTing. By the way, I mentioned James Patterson in my last MSTing. Rei said that he was the first to try to destroy the world with bad writing. I said this in relation to Patterson’s “Cat And Mouse”, easily one of the worst novels I’ve ever read.

By the way, yes, I’m still writing “Card Captor Syaoran”. At the rate I’m going I’ll be finished around the same time Kit Spooner finishes “Nadesico’s Daughter”.

-CardCaptor Schlueter (aka Syaoran-kun)

> “H-Hi M-M-Miss, Hehe, v-vice p-principal lady sir. Uh, w-we were just s-s-signing u-up f-f-for the play, uh sir. Ah, >hehehe…”

Mystery Science Theater 3000 and its related characters and situations

are trademarks of and (c) 2001 by Best Brains, Inc. All rights

reserved.

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